have danced all night

nighmares - cheezburger com

Yesterday was an early start for me, because I had the laundry room booked from 8am – early for me, because it means I have to be up by 7am. The night before I had to take a full “lucky” pill because of my “sorry ass” – it was very sore and took the pill in the middle night.

So I was still very dozy when I started my laundry adventure. That meant that I was extremely tired early in the evening – so I jumped under the duvet very early, ready to give today to my online world; visit friends, startup conversations and give answers *laughing

Felt to sleep straight away around 9pm – woke up just before midnight – and the dancing started.
A dance I could have been without; water, discomfort, numb pungent feet, lucky pill, horrific nightmares, bleeding, toilet visits, anxiety, nausea, tossing and turning. There was nothing to stop the rock n’roll – TV on and off in the bedroom.

After I had the same horrific nightmare for the second time – I started crying … felt truly “shitty” and left the bed for the kitchen table. There I sat until the morning had arrived, had breakfast just after 8am … then I crawled under the duvet again and slept like a baby until 12.30pm.

One thing is for sure that dancing with demons isn’t for the faint hearted *laughing. So I will come and visit you later, maybe after the ice skating and a big bowl of pop corn.

“If you can’t get rid of the skeleton in your closet,
you’d best teach it to dance.”
George Bernard Shaw

anxiety - positivemed com

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61 thoughts on “have danced all night

  1. I am so sorry about “the dance”. I know, there’s nothing you can do about it all. But I surely admire your ability to find humor in some of it and share with us. I am with you as all of your readers are. I’ll be your dance partner any time! Peace –

    • … nights like this occurs now and then, but it was the nightmares that really put things on an edge for me, very unpleasant.
      I think if we share some of our unpleasant moments, maybe others realize that they are not alone in the same situation. But I don’t want to dwell about my problems, doesn’t make anyone happy.
      My dancing partner ??? Thank you so much – haven’t had one for years. And I’m a bit of a dancing queen. *smile

  2. Oh, honey! How miserable! The discomfort is bad enough (and bleeding too!) but nightmares when you do go to sleep is just too much. I seldom have nightmares but when I do I lay awake the rest of the night, worrying. (if it’s real, or maybe a premonition of something terrible to come)
    Hope the rest of your weekend is peaceful, and that Tuesday brings good news. 🙂

    • The nightmares was so real .. and when I fall back to sleep .. the same dream came back – that was what made me leave the bed and I sat there for hours just looking out of the window – was so feed up with everything. I don’t hope that my dreams comes true. *smile – had a good rest today watching figure skating most of the day. I don’t have to much hope for Tuesday, not the butt doctor I’m seeing. *smile

  3. 😦 I can’t ‘like’ this Viveka. I’m sorry it was such a shitty night. I hope the Olympics helps you feel better. I need to go look them up. I watched a good bit of the opening ceremony but havent caught any of it today. No more dancing tonight for you I hope!

    • Only some from the opening during the night … fantastic show.
      Figure skating the whole afternoon … from bed. Start to get tired again now .. falling to sleep while writing at times. No luck pills tonight. Yes, it was a truly shitty night. Long time since I had it like last night.

      • 😦 I hope it was the last time you have it that bad. I’m glad it was better last night Viveka. You are so strong, it is difficult to watch/know anyone is in pain.

  4. Oh, my dear Viveka, your poor woman! I bet you felt like a huge pile of sh.. after that night. I hope you enjoyed the skating today – I missed it. Next time. ANd I guess now I’ll get myself some popcorn, you made me really hungry for it 😉 xo Many big hugs, my dear! 🙂 xo

  5. Viveka, that was awful…I wish you some good sleep now and no troubles. I agree with you on telling people – that might get everybody who’s having problems feel that there are others too.

    • A-C, I had a really good sleep last night – woke up even later today. Now I’m going to do some standing up -ironing. Hate it. I think I have to cut down on the blogging … because sitting isn’t doing my butt any good. Great visitors this week and next week Stockholm and Mr Buble – so that will give me a natural break.

  6. That’s a shitty feeling when you want to sleep and can’t. I wish the dancing was for a happy occasion not to drive the devils away. But I like how you dealt with it. You are a fighter!

    • Bebs, no use giving up … doesn’t change anything – but there wasn’t much dancing going on .. during Friday night – more than up and down from the bed.
      I still think dancing is great to drive demons away .. because it makes me feel much better … a great tune to dance to.
      Thanks for your kind thoughts.

      • I hope you were not stressed out on my behalf today – that wasn’t meant to be. I had a real rough night .. but it happens at time, I don’t talk about every time, but sometimes I have a need to get it out of my system. Nobody, not even me … will feel good about reading about my problems. *smile
        Anyhow glad you not maxed anymore. *smile

  7. It’s bad enough that you can’t sleep and have to dance to the bathroom all night but nightmares on top of that is so unfair. I’m glad you got some sleep in the morning. Hopefully the hospital can provide you with some relief. I’ll send positive vibes through cyberspace….Viveka will be better, Viveka will be better, Viveka will be better, etc…….

    • Thank you so much for your kind thoughts and concern – I slept very well last night – didn’t wake up until noon, so I needed a good sleep.
      Have been to the hospital and they can’t do much about my problem, caused by the radio therapy, but I also have an infection, that I have medicine for now …. And it eases a bit, but then I get moments like this.
      Also I think I have been sitting down to much on Friday – have to ease on the blogging a bit. So I will take a break to the end of month.

  8. What a horrific night you had, dear Viveka! Nightmares are so awful, and combined with everything else you had to endure, you must have felt like you’d really been through the wringer. So, you can still keep your sense of humour and give us some Rock ‘n’ Roll music as well. 🙂 I hope you will sleep much better tonight, and that Tuesday’s doctor’s visit will help sort out some of your problems. Big hugs to you. xx

    • Naomi, thank you so much for your concern and caring thoughts … and of course the hugs, it’s a slightly better – but not okay- slept well yesterday night, but this night very unsettled again. Morning hug back!

  9. Oh my … that sorry ass interrupting life once again. Meanwhile, each time I see a Swede in the Olympics, I think of you because I know you’re cheering with a lot of pride.

    • Thank you so much … yes, the sorry ass is not getting any better *smile
      Yes, the Swedes has taken some medals, but no gold yet – had hopes for the Swedish ladies curling team – they are so great … but I don’t think it gone that well.
      Norway is doing fantastic.
      Thank you so much for thinking of me … Frank, you are a sweetheart.
      Going to Stockholm next week … so back to my online world after

  10. Just checking on you 🙂 Have read all the comments so I know things are a little bit better. It was my daughter’s 1st wedding anniversary yesterday and they’re spending a few days in York (come down from Venice!) so I’m going for a meetup on Wednesday. It’s just an hour or so on the train.
    Fingers crossed for tomorrow 🙂 Big bear hug!

    • Hi there, thanks for looking after me. Yesterday I was on a big check up on the hospital, still sore – everything looks fantastic when it’s about my female parts … what is left of them anyhow. *laughing – sorry ass .. same answer again, the price some of us has to pay .. after surviving cancer.
      How is the flooding where you are???? Terrible – see every evening on the news.
      York, beautiful city – I know you will have a great time. Can’t believe that is already a year since they got married .. I remember that the first comment I made on your post about you buying your dress for the wedding … that is the first time we met. *smile – so we have anniversary too.
      I have deciced that I will stay away from my online world until I’m back from Stockholm. My butt needs a rest – today one of my girlfriends are coming down from Gothenburg and Monday … I will fly to Stockholm.
      I will keep an eye on you while I’m away. *smile

      • I have to keep checking. Can’t help myself 🙂 Thanks for letting me know.
        Rainy day- 2 hour brunch in Bettys! And some hugs 🙂
        No flooding here. We’re so lucky! Enjoy Stockholm 🙂 Buble hugs- mm-hmm!

      • Hi there, everything fine in this end …. still buzy with my friend visit – couldn’t sleep this morning, up early so some time to spend here in this world too. Glad that the flooding hasn’t reached you – every evening they shows the problems there over.
        You stay dry … and weekend hugs … from another dull area of our world, but dry.

      • Hi there, a big hug from Stockholm … today we have been busy booking our holiday … Chicago & Las Vegas in Sept. Got really good deals on flights. Only hotel in Las Vegas, becasue I can’t make up my mind .. about where I want to stay. Have-a-lovely-week-hug.*smile

      • A big hug back from Hartlepool! 🙂 That sounds wonderful. I’ll pretend not to be jealous 😦
        Love you, Vivi. Take good care. Give my love to the man xx

  11. We sometimes have those crappy nightmares and I often wonder if they are a portent to something or my over active imagination. Glad you got back to sleep finally!

    • I think nightmares has something to do with our worries and mental state … for me they were so real this time, and the I dreamed the same dream twice that night.
      They was not scare, but very real … that all my friends stood me up and set me up, so I missed my flight – where ever I was going. *smile

  12. Aw, you poor love. Sorry to hear that things have been a bit rough lately. I haven’t been sleeping well myself over the past few nights… it’s horrible as it drags into your day and leaves you feeling rather unsettled and shaken. Praying that you will sleep better soon and that your infection will clear up fast xxxx

    • This with health and sleeping doesn’t really go together – but it’s what it’s …. and some nights are rougher than others,
      I slept the following night … so the level is okay again. It’s terrible not to be able to sleep. Too much going on in our heads, that’s what it’s. I hope that you have got your sleep back.!!!! It can be so many different things that interfere without sleep pattern.
      By the way what dates will you be in Malmoe???

    • Nice thoughts – I know people that live with it constantly, must be terrible … glad it only happens to me once in a while. *smile Have a great weekend now.

    • Madhu, thanks for your care and concern – my check up went very well .. but even this doctor said that my butt problems I have to live with – it’s the price for some patients to pay for still being alive – not much comfort, but they gave me more “lucky pill” *smile

    • Nightmares … no very often that I suffer from them – but it has to our mental status when we get them. But those was terrible – it was all about how my closest friends stood me up.

  13. I know you and your sorry ass are probably in Stockholm at this time, but just letting you know I was thinking about you during those Swedish golds in the cross country relays. The woman’s race was incredible!!!!

    • Yes, it was an amzing race and preformance from the Swedish girls – and the men … too.
      I’m up in Stockholm just now – today we have been booking our holiday …. Chicago & Las Vegas here we come in Sept.
      Through looking around we save over $650. A lot of money.
      I wish you a great week.

  14. Sorry about the dancing all night. I feel with you in all the agony, and at the same time smile of your humorous approach to it all. May you have a wonderful stay in Stockholm. I will cheer for the Swedes in Sotsji.

    • Thank you so much – in Stockholm now .. and I really enjoy myself … this morning I woke up to a white soft day.
      Thanks for cheering on the Swedes – my friend doesn’t have any of the channels that sends OS. I know there was some medals yesterday.

    • Not very often I have night mares … but this was so scary, because it was about my closest friends and they all stood me up. And I had the same dream twice that night … It was truly scary.

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